Since my son’s bone marrow transplant, we’ve been hiding in solitude–keeping away from germs, afraid of waking up the monster beast called cancer and its violent return. I do miss my social life. I miss traveling. Loneliness has become my favorite companion.
Meanwhile, I have been keeping myself busy easing me from the melancholy that’s been ravaging inside me. I’ve been going for long walks, watching and observing the ducks in the lake. They have kept me entertained for hours, unable to notice the passing of time.
I realized how social they are. They are always in groups and never alone. Whoever is leading the pact seems to be doing a great job getting everyone to follow obediently and harmoniously. They all swim in one direction and when they reach at the end of the lake, they turn around and swim towards the opposite direction. It is strange yet funny how those ducks have consumed my thoughts during my meditative walks. They temporary kept me sane and gave me an excuse to escape from my own world.
I have also spotted this crane at the lake by our house a few days ago. A crane is a popular symbol in Asian culture. A Japanese girl named Sadako Sasaki folded paper cranes as a symbol of good fortune, healing, happiness, and success. She was a victim of the radiation from the Hiroshima disaster and later died of leukemia.
Could this be a coincidence or is this a sign from the gods that healing and happiness will soon come?
I realized that happiness can be achieved from simple things. I realized that a simple walk can relieve me from moments of sadness. Unexpected creatures can temporary amuse me, elating me from the mundane world I live in. There is definitely beauty in simplicity.
True… that is why I am missing my hometown Auckland.
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Be strong! Kisses and hugs for you!
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Thank you so much!! Hugs
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I’m sorry it’s taking me so long to pop by, but you, your son and family have never been far from my thoughts. I hope the New Year will bring you all much joy. I know what you mean about finding solace in a simple walk, watching nature and just being. Lots of love x
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Thank you so much Ting! Life has gotten better since we came back from the hospital. My son is getting stronger and stronger! We are positive this new year will bring positive changes and no more heartaches and tears! Hugs!
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Oh I am glad to hear he is getting stronger and better. YES! Here’s to a better, healthier 2016!
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Yes for 2016! 😊
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Be strong and my thoughts are with you. I hope now things get better.. hugs xoxo
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Thank you Indah! How are you adjusting to the American life? I hope it isn’t too cold for you over there. Keep us posted with your new life! Hugs
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Thinking of you and your family and sending my best wishes for a healthy and happy New Year! 🙂
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Thank you so much!! Take care.
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😊
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I honestly think your writing is damn good! Walang bola yan. I wish I can blog more but I seem to abandon the effort just in the first few sentences of my draft haha!
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I wouldn’t really mind doing the kind of routine you have–with those beautiful views and animals around. But I understand, Boots… I hope your son is doing far better now.
Sometimes the simple things you have around are the things we need to get back on track…
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I have continued my daily walks and it’s been very therapeutic. My son is doing well and we are hoping it stays that way. Thank you for reading. I can only wish I’m as good of a writer as you are! I love your blog!
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Common, Boots. Thank you for saying that. It is very humbling but I believe my writing style is still a work in progress. You are the one I admire here. Hope you’ll get to blog more often soon. That is something I would want to do in 2016. The last quarter of the current year is a struggle. I can hardly post a blog.
Cheers to a “blog-friendly” year in 2016!
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Hi and thanks for checking out my blog, Boots. I really identified with this post. In the months following my husband’s death many years ago, I would get up each morning determined to find one moment – just one – that made getting out of bed worthwhile. It might have been a V of migrating geese against the sunset, a beam of sunlight highlighting one bright red barn on an otherwise grey day or the sunny yellow of an entire field of dandelions – but there was always one moment. Day by day I learned to find more of them and string them together to keep me going. You will too.
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Oh karen! Thank you! It’s been a tough journey for us but I’m glad that I can still get up each day to see the beauty in this world. And that I can still believe that life is beautiful. Looking forward to you upcoming posts about your Annapurna trek.
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Hi Boots, I’ve been wondering about you and how your family is doing, so it’s good to hear from you. I hope everyone is doing as well as they can be.
All the best
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Hi Drew! I had a post before this one to let everyone know cancer is gone!! He is still in a healing process, we all are! Mine is dealing with PTSD. Trying to seek counseling soon. Thank you!
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I’m very happy to hear that.
I apologize for missing your prior post – I follow a number of blogs and sometimes go a few days without reading anything, so things do tend to get lost in the shuffle.
I have thought of your family though, and am happy that you are now in a healing/recovery phase.
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No need to apologize. I totally understand. I haven’t been very active with the blogs lately (both writing and reading those I follow). Someday, I’ll come back fully renewed and hopefully completely happy again.
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Oh Boots… You are so strong. And yet I bet sometimes you feel tired of having to be strong. May the future be kinder to you and your family. *hug*
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You pretty much summed up my feelings. I had a Facebook post once telling my friends to stop calling me “strong”, “brave”, “courageous”, etc, because I’m not. Anyone who’s dealing with this situation will do what they can. You learn to be strong because all you want is to survive.
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I completely understand.
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I’m glad you’re finding solace in nature. It truly is a great cure, even if only for a temporary time. I’m praying for you and your family.
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Thanks Jay. Maybe because nature is God’s gift to us. I feel so peaceful with it.
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