Last year I made a pact with myself: in order to move on with my life, I need to stop thinking about the past, to stop worrying about the future, and to only focus on the present. But last night, it all brought me back to the past and once again felt all the emotions I have been trying to escape from.
“I need to move around a bit. To shuffle my surroundings. To wake up in cities I don’t know my way around and have conversations in languages I cannot entirely comprehend. There is always this tremendous longing in my heart to be lost, to be someplace else, to be far far away from all of this.”
I waited for the rain to subside, but it just kept pouring. I hate wasting time while on vacation so I abruptly woke up my son and told him to get ready. “But it’s still raining!” he said. “Yeah, so? I have the perfect place in mind!” I told him.
I’m one of those crazy people who absolutely adore the rain! The soft pitter patter of the rain is the most peaceful sound in the world. Watching each raindrop is genuinely one of my favorite entertainments. But when the rain stops, and the sun begins to show up, I always have this strange feeling of disorientated chaos, as if the sun had obliterated my zen. However, when you’re on vacation, it’s a totally different story. The rain becomes your nemesis, especially in a city where most of the activities are done outdoors
I was that troubled water in the song, Bridge Over Troubled Water, but fortunately I’ve been provided with so many bridges in my life to help ease the heartbreak. Because bridges have that profound meaning in my life, I have added something in my bucket list—to cross (on foot) every bridge I come in contact with. You can guess that when I flew to San Francisco, I had one itinerary in mind.
I feel more spiritual now than I have ever been but it has nothing to do with religion. My new found spirituality is centered on being more open and accepting of things I have not been accustomed to.
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